Let’s start with the fundamentals. Every little girl is (or ought to be!) taught this simple rule: if a man who is not a trusted relative tries to get you to go along with him, or to do something you don’t want to do, or wants to give you candy or something, say no. If he pursues you, run! Scream! If necessary, swing at him and kick him where it hurts.
But little girls grow into big girls, and things get more complicated. The good-lookers find they can use their whiles to gain advantages. Advantages among other women, men, employers... anyone with eyes. Oh, I’m sure women’s righters are horrified by this simple fact of life. Of course their horror is a result of their blind adherence to the left’s ideology, not to the facts of life.
So a young woman finds herself in a locked office – at the company she works for, or in a politician’s office, or at college for example – and suddenly that simple rule she learned as a child becomes, well... another “choice.” Why doesn’t she simply say no. Or run? The door is locked? Why doesn’t she scream? She’s a big girl, why doesn’t she punch and kick?
Could it be that she is now of two minds? All that kiddie stuff is undignified at her age now. And now “candy” is being offered in the form of a job, promotion, part in a movie, better grades... whatever. It’s a simple way to get ahead, she thinks. It takes a good, strong lady to hold self-respect and dignity above career advancement. Maybe the candy man is somebody slimy, or ugly, or maybe a good-looking guy she kind of likes. All she has to do is something she can wash out of her conscience later. Hey, who knows, maybe it will turn into a pleasant affair. At any rate, she thinks, it’s just “life.”
But there are some things which can’t be washed away so easily. She doesn’t mention it to anyone except maybe a girlfriend. The friend tells her, “Men. They’re all the same. Pigs.” Then when there is no job or promotion or movie part forthcoming, bitterness sets in. Hell hath no fury like... well, you know the old saying. Revenge rears its ugly head. Time to call Gloria.
Maybe this is why some media divas are so angry, adamant, vindictive. They didn’t scream or kick. They played along, offering up their own candy in exchange for something. Some get rich that way. Lessons quickly learned by other attractive young women.
So, are all men “pigs?” No. We are not all like that. Though too many are. Let me illustrate with a personal experience. During my career as a creative director in New York, I supervised many young women. One attractive young lady who joined my group soon found herself in an awkward situation. To get to her office, she had to pass by the office of an oinker who set his sights upon her. Welcome to harassment hell. It grew intense over the ensuing days. I had no idea this was going on but did notice something was affecting her work. Eventually, she came to me, upset and somewhat scared. She never exactly told me what kind of candy was being offered, or what kind of threats. I began investigating to make sure it was actually happening. It was.
It so happened that the guy harassing her out-ranked me. Never-the-less I went to this jerk’s office, closed the door behind me, and told him, as friendly-like as I could, that what he was doing was stupid. It was wrong. Told him he was hurting this young lady who he claimed to like. Told him rumors were getting around. Told him it was making him look bad, embarrassing, and would come back to hurt his career. To my surprise, this tough Brooklyn born-and-raised guy took my advice to heart. He knew I was right. He thought I was looking out for him. The harassment ended. The young lady thanked me and got on with her career. Why didn’t I go to management? He and I were management!
That is the way it’s supposed to happen. A big brother type steps in when needed. But it rarely actually happens that way. Or maybe it happens more often than we think because, in the day’s news, you don’t often hear about good outcomes.
Ladies, if you don’t take a stand at the moment the bad stuff happens, face it, be honest now; despite today’s cultural tides to the contrary, you are partly to blame. Democratic House member, Rep. Marcy Kaptur, shocked fellow lawmakers Wednesday when she said that the revealing clothing that some female members and staffers wear is an “invitation” to sexual harassment. I’m certain Representative Kaptur didn’t mean the resulting harassment was literally invited – it’s never, ever justified – but she makes a salient point. America’s culture has deteriorated, and this includes our general dress code in business, government and education situations. Nature is being tested to the limit.
One last thing. In my younger years, I too was (and more than a few times) on the receiving end of uninvited sexual advances by those who were in a position to help – or hurt – me. I went through my own internal struggle. Is it good for my career? Will I have regrets? I rejected the candy. No regrets.
Posted by andyboy at 12/13/2017 07:16:00 PM