12.25.2016

TRUMP’S WHIZZBANG WALL



“Before I built a wall,
I’d ask to know
What I was walling in or walling out,
And to whom I was like

To give offense.”

               ― Robert Frost
Fences and walls can be effective and even soothing, at least for those who build them. Richard Engel
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/walls_3.html


        Oh fooey, Robert!

        There are walls, and then there is The Trump Wall.

        Anti-Trump Wallsters undoubtedly think the Donald’s Wall will just be a big wall. But I’m thinking it will be a sight to behold. Hundreds of miles of opportunity for vertical Americana. A magnificent cultural edifice! Designed with architectural elan, worth seeing, a tourist attraction, not to mention lucrative bonuses for the most efficient builders.

        I’m anticipating sections decorated with art murals and colorful tile work. The top will be wide enough for bike trails and hikers and runners. A double wall with a no-man’s land in between; perhaps the inner wall may support a roadway for cross-continental truck and train traffic. A new kind of Wall-a-thon can be run on it. It will have memorial sections for fallen heroes of our wars. Giant letters and script will emblazon the sides; Greatest Quotes from America’s History, reminding all that freedom is precious and must be protected by a real wall if it is to be enjoyed by a nation.

        All this and so much more. The Wall will be fun!
        
Americans and Mexicans will be invited to buy a concrete block or brick or tile with their name or image or whatever emblazoned on it... just as American schoolkids gave their nickels and pennies to fund the base for our Statue of Liberty. The bricks will be embedded in The Wall, permanent testaments of Americans’ dedication not only to security but to culture.

        Maybe one section in California will have a Hollywood Wall of Fame with film stars buying miles and miles to immortalize themselves. Like sections of highways which various concerns pledge to keep clean. Arched niches can hold cremated remains of the dead. “Be a real part of The Wall.”

        Why it could even  include an intra-national pipeline. Think of it! It could be graded to allow flood waters from the Southeastern States to flow westward, helping to irrigate the driest parts of the Southwest. The top could be covered with solar panels, easily enough to light up all those neon signs in Vegas... or El Paso on both sides of The Wall.

        C’mon liberals... loosen up. Act like Can Do Americans for a change.

        Of course, I suppose, cross-border drug trade is far too lucrative to simply walk away from. Illicit drug and coyote industries are, well... industrious. They will try to tunnel under the wall. They will try to fly drones over the wall. They will try to send sailing vessels around it. They will build trebuchets and catapults to toss their products over the wall, with catchers on the U.S. side. And, finally tiring of losing the Battle of Trump’s Wall, they will simply by-pass the Wall and start growing their stuff on the U.S. side. But fear not; there’s lots of sun down there, The Wall can be terraced so our Department of Agriculture can farm on them to grow G.I. Mary Jane or something to pay for the maintenance of The Wall.

        Somehow, in his inimitable style, I trust Donald and his team will figure out how to, as the old Johnny Mercer tune goes... 

Accen-tu-ate the positive
E-lim-inate the negative,
Latch on to the affirmative,
Don’t mess with Mister In-Between.